The Mummy Diaries: Two babies - Week 2

The Mummy Diaries: Two babies - Week 2

by Emma Hargan
article from Tuesday 3, July, 2018

HELP, help, help!! Thank God for Grandparents is all I’ll say. How on earth anyone manages a newborn baby and a toddler after a C-section is beyond me. 

The newborn is a doddle – which I never thought I’d say. Lily’s routine consists of sleeping, eating, changing – done! She’s up once in the night (usually) and has put on a whole 1 lb since coming home from the hospital, which now makes her weight 9lb 8oz’s. I thought we had it easy with Jamie as he was so good, but Lily is even better.

Jamie’s routine consists of sleeping, eating, changing, wrecking the house, eating, trying to escape out of the door, eating, throwing himself off the coffee table, eating, screaming round the shops, eating, shower, PJ’s, cuddles, then bed. Jamie now weighs over 2 and a half stone. This means that after having the section, I can’t drive, do housework or lift Jamie for 6 weeks! Not an easy thing to do if you don’t have help. 

Grandparents to the rescue!

We’re lucky, my Mum and Dad were able to stay the week that Lily was born and then my Mum for the following 4 weeks after. Mum has basically taken over looking after Jamie and doing pretty much all the housework for me, so I can concentrate on getting myself healed up and look after Lily. What a Godsend!

As we are now into the second week, I’m feeling much better and no longer needing painkillers. The public health nurse has been in a couple of times to check on Lily’s weight and to make sure I’m healing okay. I’m pretty sure when she saw my name on the list of her visits to do she must of been thinking, ‘My God, here’s this crazy lady again!’

Mum and I had managed to get the kids and ourselves into a great routine and were getting along great – well, at least for a day or two…

Our first family trip out was on Saturday. I was so looking forward to it but a bit apprehensive at the same time. We decided we would take the kids to a place called Tropical World, which was an indoor/outdoor animal petting zoo. We had taken Jamie there for his first birthday and he absolutely loved it, so we thought it would be a good place to go for our first venture. 

It was very warm, and I was worried Lily would get cranky at being in the pushchair but it wasn’t Lily that I needed to worry about. On arrival, we got Lily sorted in the pushchair and thought Jamie would prefer to be in his reigns and walk round the wee zoo. My mum took charge of the pushchair and hubby James took Jamie in. It started out great. Jamie was loving having the freedom of walking around and Lily was out for the count sleeping. I started to relax, stupidly falling into the false sense of security that everything was going well. This was until we got to the bird sanctuary. The problem was, was the birds were high up and Jamie didn’t know to look up and so started to get frustrated as we were lifting him up. The slow boil of a tantrum began. 

To try and settle Jamie, we took him out of the bird sanctuary to find a woman who worked in the place was holding a snake and was allowing people to pet it or hold it. She saw Jamie and started to chat to him while walking over – disaster. The poor creature nearly was ricocheted across the room and Jamie just lost the plot. It’s bad when I tell you that the monkeys were behaving better than my son. 

In a last gasp attempt to settle him, I pulled a Milky Way out of the bag and gave it to him. Result! He had stopped crying, but in a split second had fired the entire bar into his mouth. Ah Jesus, I grabbed him and managed to pull the bar from his mouth before he choked. Well, there it began. The biggest meltdown I have ever seen. We legged it out of the place as fast as we could. I could see other parents looking at us in sympathy, thanking their lucky stars that it wasn’t their own kid playing up! Once we got the kids back into the car, Jamie just looked up at me and smiled. The poor wee soul was just roasting with the heat and all I wanted to do was burst into tears with the stress of it all. Believe it or not, that was one of the highlights of the week. We were on for a steady decline…

Another scorcher of a day, we decided we would take the kids out in the buggy up the main street for a wee walk. After getting all the messages done, I said I would get us all an ice cream from the shop to have on the way home. I left Mum and the kids outside and went in to get the cones. I could hear Jamie starting to get noisy, as he knew what I was going in for so I hurried out with the ice creams and started to help Jamie with his. Mum said, “do you fancy a wee glass of wine later?” I mean, seriously, do bears poop in the woods??? I’m now a mum of 2 kids – I could drink a box of wine later! I replied, “that would be great.” So Mum went into the shop to buy some wine. 

At that point, Jamie let out this shriek that made people walking past jump. The ice cream had fallen off the cone and onto his lap. In toddler world – absolute disaster! Panic set in and I was frantically trying to scoop the ice cream up onto the cone and into his mouth just to stop him screaming. Right on cue  a familiar looking car pulls up next to the pavement beside me. The public health nurse leans out of the window just as I’m trying to shovel ice cream down my son’s throat and Mum walks out of the shop and says, “They didn’t have any nice wine so I just got us a bottle of Martini instead!” Fuck! 

My face beaming red, I said to the nurse, “oh are you on your way to see me?” She replied, “well I was, but I could come back in half an hour?” Oh my God, not only does this women think I’m a complete nutter; she’ll think my mother and me are a couple of alcoholics!

We frantically raced back to the house, and got Jamie changed into clean clothes and hid the Martini in the fridge like a couple of teenagers before the nurse arrived. She came in and I started chatting on like I had verbal diarrhoea and making excuses about having visitors coming in this evening and they loved Martini! She must have thought this woman has completely lost the plot. After the nurse had done her checks and left, Mum says to me, “do you fancy a Martini now?”

I laughed, “just stick a couple of straws in the bottle!”

So, the moral of the story this week? Make sure and buy all the wine you need while doing your weekly shop and then the public health nurse won’t see it and it makes family days out bearable!

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